One Egg Shy

The musings of Chris. Writer, humanitarian, hero.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

A Call to Arms

I'm sure many of you have seen the story about Jie-jie, the three-armed Chinese baby (pictured right). The story brought a lot of attention to the chinese baby, as well as a lot of jokes about what a great piano player he'd be or how great he'd be in the sack, some of them made by yours truly.

Unfortunately, Jie-jie will never reach his full potential.

You see, cruel Chinese doctors have decided to remove Jie-jie's third arm. That's messed up. Why doesn't Jie-jie have a choice in the matter? It's like baptizing a kid at such a young age; he or she should have a hand (or three) in the decision.

Sources close to Oneeggshy are reporting that the reason is because in China, each couple is only allowed to have one child, and Jie-jie technically counted as 1.08 of a person, meaning that the extra arm had to be removed.

Gone are Jie-jie's chances of being the star of a freak show. Gone are his chances of performing the old "third arm" pick-pocket trick. Gone are his chances of standing out from the other billion, boring Chinese people.

It's too bad. Jie-jie could have been something; something special.

Hopefully they'll let him keep the arm they removed. Never hurts to have an extra arm laying around, if you know what I mean (wink wink).

5 Comments:

  • At 4:01 PM, Blogger Angela in Europe said…

    That comment about it being 1.08 a person is just plain wrong!! Funny, hilarious even, but wrong.

     
  • At 3:03 AM, Blogger hadez2000 said…

    lol.. you are full of shit... its all good though lol

     
  • At 5:27 AM, Blogger Craig said…

    you know what he'll really miss out on, that gag in Naked Gun when the girl tries to slap Leslie Nealson and he catches it, then she tries the other hand and he catches that one too, then a hand come out of noware and slaps him... No problem for Jie-jie.

     
  • At 2:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i saw this kid on the news. i can't help but wonder if the third arm would have been an evolutionary leap forward.. bringing us one step closer to a genetically superior being such as goro from mortal kombat (perhaps with better table manners).

     
  • At 8:26 AM, Blogger Chris said…

    I don't know...I once had Goro over for tea and found him incredibly good company. He said "please" and "thank you," pet my four dogs (at once), and washed his hands when using the restroom. The moral of this story? Never judge a person by his or her video game persona.


    This message brought to you by EA Games: Challenge Everything.

     

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