One Egg Shy

The musings of Chris. Writer, humanitarian, hero.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Age of Luxury

We live in an automated world. While the predictions for the 21st century made by science fiction writers forty years ago—flying cars, time travel, moon colonies—haven’t yet come around, on a day-to-day basis, we do have some amazing technological advances at our disposal.

Think about it. How many times a day is life made easier by automated devices? In my house, for one, we have several timers for different devices. Our lights turn on 30 minutes before dusk and turn off at midnight. Our central air conditioner runs at different temperatures during different times during the day. We also have motion censors ensuring our safety. A motion censor in the garage turns on a different light whenever someone enters so that we don’t stub toes or bust asses. Our garage door shoots a laser at foot level across the span of the ground—if the door is closing and the laser is broken, the door goes back up, saving us from having to roll Indiana Jones-style to get through.

But it goes beyond the home: most bathrooms are completely automated as well. At the restaurant where I work, the urinals flush when you walk away, the water and soap turn on when you move your hands underneath, and the paper towels come out when your hands, dripping wet, reach for something to dry yourself with.

What would happen, however, if we suddenly lost all of these automatic luxuries? Would the customers at my restaurant leave full toilets and dirty hands in the bathroom?

It’d be even worse at my house. I panic to imagine coming home without our amenities. I’d trip over boxes on my way into the garage and stub my toe in the dark kitchen. Stubbing my toe would send me sprawling and to the ground. When I try to get up, I’d slip on the pool of sweat which has collected on the ground due to the lack of air conditioning. Dazed, I’d try to exit via the garage door, but I’d be decapitated by the garage door which doesn’t stop when I walk under it.

While this technology is impressive, I just hope it isn’t fostering too much laziness. I hope in 200 years, we still have the ability to walk around and wipe our own asses.

This post was written by the Autoblog 2000.


  • At 8:16 PM, Blogger Angela in Europe said…

    Um, I do live in a place where there is no automation so to speak. Inconvience is the name of the game here.

  • At 4:28 AM, Blogger Craig said…

    i think people would take their hands with them. They may be dirty but still i dont think they would leave them in the bathroom.

    Yet i am amazed at how funny you are. Keep on writing, man.


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