One Egg Shy

The musings of Chris. Writer, humanitarian, hero.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Super Bowl

Anyone have a newspaper?
So I started this post with the intention of telling how I took a crap at work for the first time ever, and going into a history of how in 13 years of grade and high school I only used the bathroom once for #2. I had a streak (pun intended) of 11 years going before I finally broke down.

But then, when I was searching for pictures of a toilet (one I found had a turd in the shot), I found this picture of a cat on the toilet that stole the focus. It's part of an article on toilet training your kitty.

It's hilarious. I thought this was only possible in such hilarious movies as Meet the Parents but apPARENTSly (I have to stop) you too can teach your cat to crave the backsplashes of a toilet.

I think this is a great idea, but it seems as if it takes a lot of patience and dediCATion (seriously, someone stop me). I can't imagine having to, "teach him proper squatting posture. Catch him beginning to use the toilet as much of the time as possible and show him where his feet are supposed to go." I think my cat (if I had one) would probably be annoyed if I came in while he was trying to do his business and moved him all around. I try to be empathetic and imagine someone rearranging me while I do my business, and I can say I think I'd be pissed (I'm just going to start a tally...that's 4) if someone moved my legs and legs around.

I can imagine this being humiliating to a cat, but the end results are definitely worth it, if not for lessening the amount of work involved in caring for your cat, than at least in the value of your cat as a party favorite. If, at a party, the host asked, "Who wants to see Bonkers shit in the toilet?" I'd be first in line. But I'm also easily amused.

Cat owners: try it out and let me know if it works. It beats the crap (5) out of a boring Saturday morning.


  • At 1:44 PM, Blogger Angela in Europe said…

    I am soooo normal. Loved the puns. Sorry about the smudge on your streak.

  • At 11:33 PM, Blogger Jake said…

    I heard you have to saran wrap the toilet for a few weeks to get it to work. That way the do their thing without falling in for awhile. As for myself, I prefer to just flush the cat.

    If I had made those puns, you would have punched me in the face. Oh the felirony.


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