One Egg Shy

The musings of Chris. Writer, humanitarian, hero.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Last fall two friends of mine stopped by on an impromtu visit. I did improv comedy with them in college, and they had scattered to Tennessee and California, respectively. They visited on a whirlwind tour of the east coast, driving and visiting as many people as possible. I had two hours notice. It was nice.

Anyway, while here, the Californian friend told me about a website he was on called is advertised as a way for people to share and discover music. After you create a profile, you download software that tracks what artists you play, and then compiles a page based on your preferences. You can then search for other members who like the same crap as you do.

Well, in January I decided to make a page. It seemed fun! I could meet other people who liked some of the more obscure artists that I enjoyed. I signed up, made a page, attached the program to my iTunes and was good to go.

At first it was fun. I could see as the songs I played were compiled into a nice and easy to see graph. But then...but then.......

I started getting like self-conscious. I'm the type of music fan who gets obsessed with a band for a period of time. Normally, this obsession in known only to me and whomever I'm spending the most time with. But now it was displayed on my page for all to see.

One night I wanted to listen to some Iron & Wine as I read in bed. I picked nine of their songs to play and fell asleep. I woke up at 4 a.m. with the music still going, unaware that I had put iTunes on repeat. Normally, no big deal. But now it looked like I listened to these songs each 6 times in a row and it messed up my stats. I felt dumb.

Then I kind of forgot about the page. When I checked it again, I realized I had been listening to some bands a lot. I mean A LOT. Like, I listened to songs by this guy Sufjan Stevens 80 times in a week. I felt embarrassed.

I began to feel like someone was watching and judging my musical taste. I didn't want to play a certain song because of how people would look at it. Sure, I listened to some weird stuff, like a track by the Beets, that band from the show Doug (a friend sent it, I swear) and ABBA (as mentioned in a previous post). But I don't think I should be judged by what I do in the privacy of my own room. Should I?

So now I want to get rid of it, but I'm not sure how. I feel like my neurosis is on display for the entire world to see, and I hate it. Fuck Don't judge me, soulless Internet site. Dammit.

Weekly top artists:
Clem Snide 15
The Postal Service 14
Citizen Cope 13
Ben Harper 5
Feeling Embarrassed 4


  • At 4:11 PM, Blogger Jake said…

    dude, sufjan is the bomb

    i was eating a roast beef sandwich last night and I didn't realize there was deli paper inbetween the cheese until three bites in.

  • At 11:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Social Bookmarking causes the same problem for me.

    At fist, I thought it was cool to share my bookmarks with the world -- so others could visit the same websites that I visit. However, I started becoming paranoid that someone close to me would say, "Hey, I really like schoolgirls too!"

  • At 11:02 PM, Anonymous Diana said…

    I adore Sufjan...I saw him in concert back in September and it was incredible and a half. :)

  • At 9:41 AM, Anonymous Rob Danzier said…

    the postal service needs no fans.


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